Trigeminal neuralgia, face pain, and emotions

As someone who has counseled people with facial pain, I understand that it is not uncommon for someone's emotions to reach a nadir. It doesn't matter if it's my pain or the pain that belongs to someone else. So I am always concerned when I hear that someone with facial pain has emotional issues. Of course we do. What others take for granted in every day life has been taken from us, and no one seems to understand the intensity of the pain. Except the people who have it...

I wish that I could explain to the world what it is like to be unable to communicate orally with others and to not know sign language. E-mails and text messages have been some of my best friends, but not everyone has email or text-messaging. Fax machines are temperamental. Just like fax machines, sometimes we humans with facial pain can communicate orally but other times we cannot. We aren't dependable, regardless of how much we would like to be.

Pain of any type can bear on our emotions. Face pain can cause a person to have bad breath and poor dental hygiene (no brushing for days on end sometimes), robs a person of the ability to share a kiss, and going out to eat is just unthinkable. When people experience this much isolation, pain, and disability... well he or she just may get emotional.

Why some people think that the emotional issues cause the pain, I'll never know. Perhaps it's because they have never experienced disability. I've always thought that the world would be a more compassionate place if people could experience trigeminal neuralgia or other types of face pain - just for a day.

Several types of medical issues cause face pain. It could be trigeminal neuralgia, myofascial pain, neuropathic pain, or a jaw problem. These things travel along the trigeminal pathway, and they have a life of their own. We don't know when the pain will come or go. We just know that we are out of commission until it settles down.


If you get emotional because of facial pain, let me reassure you that it's normal. Take good care of yourself. If you are able to talk, you may want to see a counselor. But you may not be able to talk...

God bless you.

Bridezilla? or Facezilla?

OK. Sometimes I am better at resting in God's love than at other times. I'm feeling better now, but last week was tough. By the end of the week, I was totally frustrated. It's not just the pain; it's the medicine. It is also the feeling of hopelessness that tries to set in. But it's the hopelessness that we have to fight; no one can do it for us. In the midst of rest, I had a close encounter with someone whose behavior resembles mine from time to time.

Sunday, my pain was still raging. There wasn't too much to watch on television, so I tuned into Bridezilla and was totally fascinated. I thought about how obsessed these young women were in their quests to have a perfect day.

Bingo. A perfect day. Obsessed with a situation. Oh yeah, I had to admit that I am sometimes a Facezilla. Like a bride who wants everyone to understand what she is feeling and what she wants... I have these same feelings. I'm misunderstood. Sometimes I am angry. I hurt so badly. Why can't I just have what I want? Doesn't anybody really want to help me?

Who cares what it costs, huh? No not more flowers and bling. I want another method of treatment. Insurance doesn't cover that either? Who is going to make relief happen?

Be reasonable? I don't want to be. If the bridezilla doesn't like what the cake that has been prepared for her, she can just put her fist in the cake and smash it. Somebody will clean up her mess. I don't have the luxury of cake-smashing. Doesn't anyone understand that for once I just need to have a day with no pain? I want a day where I can talk, chew, and be free from medication. Somebody fix it!

People pity the grooms of the bridezillas and wish them luck with their demanding brides. Oh yeah. I pity my husband. It took him a few years to catch onto what I am am experiencing and how I feel, and I'll tell you how I feel: sorry. Sorry for him. He stands by now, trying to remain calm. He knows that if I get upset the pain will escalate. He just allows me to be right. How frustrating when I know that I am not.

I hope I have made this a little humorous, but the reality is that constant pain and disability can cause a person to lose perspective. Weddings aren't going to be perfect. Neither are facezillas. Have you hugged yours today?